I love you but I am not in love with you

I love you, but I'm not in love with you.
I want your friendship minus your desire.
I would not lead you falsely or betray you.
I feel the tenderness, but not the fire.
I have no reason for my lack of yearning,
No explanation for what I don't feel,
No other love to whom I might be turning,
No anguish to suggest this isn't real.
Passion is a horse that knows no master,
And I cannot with fences make it stay.
It must run free towards daylight or disaster,
Awake to glory in no other way.
So I must say what you don't want to hear,
But it's a truth that both of us must bear.

Bevis på verklig kärlek...

Till oss som drabbats av brustet hjärta någongång i våra liv:

Hur dumt det än må låta för Er andra tror jag att det finaste man kan göra
när någon man är riktigt, riktigt kär i säger att han/hon älskar någon annan än en själv
är helt enkelt att ta ett steg tillbaka och låta den kärleken blomstra.

För det största beviset på äkta kärlek måste väl ändå vara att inte stå i vägen för sin kärestas glädje
hur ont det än må göra i en själv?



Love to you, you, you and you

Love to you all my Dear Friends!

I love you

Just wanted you to know: I love you.
Months have passed since we became close friends.
Every day I find I'm thinking of you,
Though no word from you that message sends.
And yet we share all other thoughts and feelings:
I cannot wait to tell you of my day,
And you give me the gist of all your dealings,
Which makes me hope we walk in the same way.
Telling you this is opening a door
That never can be closed again, and yet
I must, because I ache for something more,
Something that I must risk all to get.
Some night, perhaps, we'll go hang out somewhere;
I will reach for you, and you'll be there.

Lust and love

The difference between love and lust is:

Love is about you.

Lust is about me.

(Author unknown for me)


A poem I like (Author unknown to me)

Sometimes I wish I were a wall
Upon which you could hang your pain--
To see it so, to know its beauty,
Bond of yearning, bearing love.

Pain is color, in between
Desire and death, white and black;
Light's most lovely at the dawn,
And then, again, approaching night.

Sometimes I wish that I could kiss
The world and take away all pain,
Feel it all, for everyone,
And then go mad to prove I'm real.

But love continues, as does pain,
And death engenders both, for aye,
And the river murmurs ceaselessly
Around the bend on which we live


Dreams do come true (Author unknown to me)

Dreams do come true, but only when
They make it through despair,
Limping into everyday
Transformed beyond repair.

No dream would be a dream if it
Could pass for something real,
Nor would we sail for paradise
Would it its shoals conceal.

So it is with love: the dream
Long longed for, now possessed,
Must be a dream no longer, but
An emperor undressed.

Stark naked it must come to us
In unaccustomed shame,
And we must take it in our arms
And love it all the same.

And we must love love as it is
That dreams might still come true,
Mangled into miracles
To make our lives anew.


The dance

Some sea birds are following the little fisherman's boat that leaves the harbour. Beautiful and nostalgic thoughts spring alive when I see this picture.

To stand here in the village harbour with you by my side makes my heart to sing. Beautiful as the Princess in the Golden World you are for me.

From an open window behind us comes suddenly some music from an old gramophone and I take your hand into mine inviting you for a dance.

You smile and before we know it the whole world has stopped. Only we holding each other tightly with love.

The Summer Party

It was time for the annual beach party that a very nice hotel held every year. All of the hotel staff was looking forward to this event and had been decorating the place where this party should be held for several days. The weather forecast had promised nice weather and as far what the sky was showing it seemed to be a correct prediction.

The beach party began with just such success, as it was meant to be. At sunset the staff lighted a big fire and several small torches they had posted around the festival area and nobody, absolutely none of the guests, disliked the event. An orchestra of 5 men began to play a lambada on a request from a tourist group. The stars in the sky were shining and the tourists were dancing happily with each other, not caring about the three unshaved, a little bit smelly and pretty drunk guys who where standing and watching the dance couples.

Especially one girl beautiful as a Princess who was dancing like a Goddess was stealing their attention. Her dancing moves were simply perfect.

So came the moment when the dancers took a little break at a little hut with the sign "Beach Cafe" outside that was also only opened for this specific area. And of course these said three fellows took the opportunity to get to know the above-mentioned girl a bit better. Or rather two of them took the opportunity, as the third fellow (Mr. Soul) was a bit shy for such acquaintance. (Yes, she was the most beautiful girl he ever had seen but why should a Princess like her even bother to look at him?)

Since Mr. Soul's friends were a bit drunk their attempt to get to know the said beautiful girl went completely wrong. It went so far so one of them behaved such a way a gentleman never should behave when he is with a girl and maybe it was when Mr. Soul saw that he became so angry so he decided to come to the girl's rescue.

The boxing match that then followed was too short to fit in this story as Mr. Soul's so-called friends were absolutely to drunk to give any pursuant resistance except for one punch that blooded Mr. Soul's nose.

Luckily the Cafe Owner, a pretty big lady in her xx-age (it is never polite to expose the age of a lady as you know) named Ruth, then came and stopped the match. As she had seen everything from the beginning she just grabbed the two knocked guys in their ears and brought them to the kitchen behind the cafe where they could help her with the dishes instead of harassing her guests. Although Mr. Soul can be a fighter he this time lost conscious when he noted that his nose was bleeding and because of this he never saw where Ruth brought his boxing opponents.
Instead he woke up by looking into a couple of eyes beautiful as shining stars and not after a while, when his mind had returned and he could focused his eyes better, he understood that these beautiful eyes belonged to that girl he wanted to rescue.

This girl who had made such impression on Mr. Soul smiled beautifully when she saw that Mr. Soul was on the way to recovery and introduced herself as Ms. Heart. With the nose filled with napkins and nose blood over his new white shirt Mr. Soul then asked, with a trembling voice, if she, this absolutely gorgeous girl, wanted to support him when he was cleaning himself in the ocean as he felt a bit dizzy. Ms. Heart smiled and said that of course she should help him. After all he at least tried to be her gallant knight of the night and together hand in hand they then left the festival area walking alone along the beach with only a little torch giving them some light. After Mr. Soul had put his now "bloody shirt" in the ocean and exposing his nude upper body for this beautiful Goddess he began to smile and said: "Me jungle hero, You Ms. Heart" in a voice that he thought a jungle hero would have when he/she was in the jungle.

(As Mr. Soul still had the napkins in his nose it sounded far from a real jungle scream however.)

When he then saw that the beautiful fairytale Princess beside him began to laugh so sweetly after his scream he also felt strong and brave as a jungle hero and for proving this he dived in the cold water before they went back up on land. The whole time he was talking the Gorilla language he had learned from all the jungle adventures he had read about in his youth.)
Behind some trees in the back of the beach line a little tree house was hidden and after Mr. Soul had carried his Princess to this tree house they both sat on the floor hugging each other. Watching the sea and the night changing back to a new day on this beautiful Paradise Island.


The nap

Do you remember the picnic we had in last year? I mean the picnic we had on the butterfly field.

Hand in hand we went out between the butterflies on this gigantic green field.

The sunshine was so bright and beautiful this special day.

I remember that we sat down under the big old oak on the blanket that I had carried and opened excitingly the food basket you had filled with secret treasures we both loved.

After we both where full of sandwiches and the home made strawberry flavoured lemonade we watched the small cumulus clouds in the sky that now had began to appear. The clouds where in different shapes and one even looked a bit like me you told before we began to play. I chased you and you chased me and when one of us caught the other a huge tickle fight took place.

As the sun was strong we soon got tired and laid ourselves down beside each other for some rest before it was time to return home. I watched you closing your beautiful eyes and saw how your breathing got heavier and heavier. I placed my arms around you and placed my mouth so close to your lips as possible without waking you up.

The air I felt from your breathing passed my mouth and went down to every little corner of my heart and soul in a heavenly way.

Suddenly your lips came closer to mine and slowely your tongue began to pass my lips and inviting my toungue to a wildly dance of fire.

No, now I remember. It was all just a dream I had when I alone took a nap under a tree except for a goat that woke me up as described.

After all I am just a single male scarecrow with only my dreams about you and, of course, a constantly hungry goat as my company.


How a legend became created

For a long time ago I got a visitor who told me the following story:

The story begins a warm Summer night 3000 years B.C. in Princess Sophia's room. Sophia, a beautiful young lady in her best age, had problems to sleep because of the warmth. After she had been twisting and turning herself around in her bed for several hours she decided to see if a second fresh air could help her to fall asleep.

She raised herself from the bed and placed her cobalt blue rope over her shoulders before she went out on her private terrace.

The air outside where instead very cool and almost a bit cold. Sophia therefore draped herself tighter in the rope she had hanging over her shoulders while she was looking on all the stars in the dark sky above. As it was in the middle of the night the whole palace where in darkness except for the little candle in Sophia had lightened up in her room.

Suddenly Sophia felt herself watched. She turned around in case it was someone from the palace that also where awake. When she did not see a single soul more than herself on the terrace she looked out on the royal garden below and there she suddenly saw a the shape of a very little person standing absolutely still watching her. Judging by the size Sophia almost immediately understood that it was a child that probably where in the garden searching for something to eat.

Knowing that she needed to do something but not knowing what Sophia took the little blue scarab she had around her hand wrist and throwed it down to the little shape at the same time she shouted "For eternal love, care and happiness." before she returned back to her bed.

The little shape was actually the 12 years old street beggar Jacob. He had been liked paralysed when he had seen Princess Sophia and totally forgot the beggars first rule. "To always hide for people who can see you when you are trespassing."

At the campfire the following night he told the whole story for his friends with such imaginative words so a legend became borne.

Sandy could not believe that the ventilation system in a prestigious college like this was so badly built so she could see right through it directly into the boys shower room. Here she had full sight on her male class mates like Johnny, David, Tiny (Oh, that is why he is called "Tiny" Sandy giggled silently.) and Andy her twin brother...

Suddenly it was no longer fun to watch the guys and since it was almost time for next class Sandy decided to abandon her watching.

The professor in Ancient Myths glorified when he left the university the same evening. He hated his work to educate obstinate brats in Ancient Myths, and especially annoying twins like this couple Andy and Sandy. Yes, the intellectual level this twin couple showed where so low so it was impossible to believe that they belonged to the 21:st century. Thanks to this it felt so good that he now could put at least the said certain two twins on place by requesting them to study the legend about a scarab...

The following day two very silent twins appear in class. Their teacher (the said Professor) ask them to step forward for telling their class mates what they had found out regarding the assignment he had given them. Hand in hand Sandy and Andy take place in front of the black board and after some seconds in silent Andy confess with a trembling voice: We, we have not done the homework... But we can tell you this Sandy quickly add...

I arrived to the city pretty late a rainy evening. Since I was in a hurry I took the first horse coach I saw outside the station and in almost gallop the driver of the coach head into the dark and narrow streets of the city. Although I felt a bit insecure there I was sitting in the wagon with only a lamp's vague light as my only company I did not care much about other things than that I wanted to come home to my old and lonely heritage as fast as possible.

At that moment the scariest scream I ever had heard takes place and my coach stops so violently so I fall down on the floor. When I come up on my feet I hear the driver swearing loudly. I look out through the window.... Andy takes a breath while Sandy continues....

And there he sees the driver swearing and jumping up and down with his muddy big boots. I had been standing in the street corner selling my flowers while suddenly this wagon from Hell comes and almost hit me and destroys everything I had with me and now I got the blame for it by this vicious driver....

I screamed to the driver to stop immediately and opened the door inviting the lady outside follow me home. Yes, she was a simple flower girl living on the streets but still it was something that attracted me to her. Although the driver tried to convince me that I was handling wrongly who cared about a girl like this we soon once again where heading towards my heritage outside the city borderline again but this time I had more company than a lamp...

Sandy takes the word again... Inside this palace like house I felt so little. The gentleman, who lived there, asked an old maid that had waited for his arrival, to help me to change clothes because I was completely wet and my face where muddy too. The maid escorted me to a room bigger than the biggest dance floor and on an enormous bed the maid placed a beautiful red dress that I was told to try... I changed my clothes but since I was tired and had never seen such beautiful soft bed before I fall asleep.

When my maid told me that my guest had fallen asleep I must confess that I felt my heart beating an extra tick of happiness... Living in my heritage alone for several of years had made me to feel old, unattractive and tired...

Not until noon the following day my guest had woken up. She came out from the room in the red skirt my maid had suggested carrying her own cloths in a pile. She looked at me like a little confused girl not knowing what she should say. I smiled and asked her to come down for lunch hearing angels playing in my heart. Yes, I was in love. Had fallen in love at the first sight.

Sandy takes now the final word again... I could not believe my ears when the gentleman instead of taking me good bye asked me to stay and help his maiden caring about his home. When he mentioned the salary and showed me my room I could not refuse the job... besides that he was a bit cute too.

Two years later it was a wedding held at heritage between... Yes, between us... And stressed by this big moment I misplaced a blue stone (a stone I had got as a payment from an Oriental sailor for some flowers he bought for his girlfriend) that was told to carry magical powers that would give the owner of it eternal love, care and happiness. As my coming husband where extremely rich I did not care about it as it probably was a hoax anyway and went out to the finest wedding that was held in 1759 instead.

The Professor and the class mates had followed the story silently. They had just been starring as hypnotised on Andy and Sandy while they where talking. Although it had been a pure fantasy product they had came up with nobody were quite sure... Nobody could come up with a story like this without anything to go on or could they? One thing is for sure said, after moments of complete silent, the Professor and that is that the person who now owns this stone will get many magical moments to look forward too.


Roses are red

Roses are red
Violets are blue
and I love you


The fiesta

I remember as it was in yesterday...

It had been a heavy traffic that had made you pretty late home from work and on top of that it was raining cats and dogs outside.

When I saw you standing there in the hall I thought you were the cutest girl my eyes ever had seen. I walked up towards you kissing away a raindrop that had been falling on your nose before I helped you off with the coat. As I understand that you need to be warm and dry quickly I invite you to sit down in our soft coach standing in the living room. Since you said that you were to tired for arguing you accept my invitation even if you had preferred changing your wet clothes first.

In the living room I switch on the VCR showing a stock fire burning wildly and long. Switching of the light and pouring you a little glass of genuine Scottish whiskey I then ask you to wait during a minute or two...

When I return I ask you to blindfold my eyes with your thick and long winter scarf. We then go hand in hand into the bathroom. There a warm and cosy bubble baths stands ready waiting for you. Around the bath stands a lot of burning candles and a number of rose flowers float around on the bubbly surface. As I am blindfolded I do not see anything I am not supposed to see while you are leaving your clothes for going into the hot water. Well hidden in the bubbles you tell me that I am allowed to see again. Picking up your clothes for carrying them out to the laundry machine I release my eyes and ask you to give me a second further again...

Coming back with my acoustic guitar I sit down on the bath playing and singing all the songs you request.

Suddenly an alarm bell sounds. You wonder what it is but I smile and say you will see before I run out into kitchen.

As I not return back again you begin to complete your bath for coming out in the kitchen too. There a big Mexican fiesta party then begins.

Can I sleep with you?

Tired and feeling lousy Sam arrives at home from work. As usually he had a long and busy day at work.

Well at home he is seeing his love and roomie Mary sitting down at the kitchen table reading some commercial papers. He walks up towards her for giving her a hug. She stops and give a little soft kiss on his lips as a response to his hug. As Sam knows that Mary is tired too he offers to give her one of his most special massages at the same time he still enjoys the remaining traces of the taste from her kiss.

Mary says it is a wonderful idea and then they go hand in hand into their bedroom. She turns on the light, take of her shoes and blue blouse and lay down face downwards on the bed. Sam for his part turn on the lamp's shade and turn off the light. On this way the room is almost dark as this will help them both to relax better.

Now follows a soft and sensual massage there Sam covers Mary's sweet back with different kinds of kisses at the same time his fingers moves around quickly on it like their were playing a classical part of a famous music composition on a piano with lots of care. Beginning to sing a song of love and romance it then does not take long before Mary turns around embracing him in her arms for the beginning of some wonderful and unforgettable moments of love....

Just in that moment a voice from the bedroom door is saying: "Mommy, Daddy I am scared. Can I sleep with you?"

The love chase

There was an average man living in the city Aberdeen.

He was seeking for a lady who wanted to be his Queen.

The chase took him from Heaven to H-ll.

Yes, the chase did not exactly ends well.

                                                             He forgot to ask the lady living there he always been.

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